THE ADDICTION OF EUPHORIA

A friend of mine suggested that I write about the positive side to having emotional extremes. I spent a while wondering why this had never occurred to me before as something to do and there are two reasons. The first is that positive feelings don't leave us feeling isolated and scared like the negative ones … Continue reading THE ADDICTION OF EUPHORIA

TRUTH: I WILL NEVER DO IT.

I meant to write this evening about the positive side to having emotional extremes but there is something else that I feel is more urgent and more important. I hurt someone that I care deeply about yesterday. Someone that I care about more than I perhaps realised until today, and who perhaps cares about me … Continue reading TRUTH: I WILL NEVER DO IT.

SUICIDAL IDEATION SAVES ME. FOR NOW.

I've lived with chronic suicidal ideation for so long that I can't really remember what it feels like to not live with it. Sometimes I think about ways to actually end my life, other times I think about just never having existed, or disappearing in a way that erases all trace and memory of me. … Continue reading SUICIDAL IDEATION SAVES ME. FOR NOW.

ON POSTNATAL DEPRESSION

I’m 35 years old. I can’t remember living without a mental health illness of some sort crippling my life. As a child, anxiety manifested itself into anorexia, and in turn OCD, and in turn profound depression. I have battled my way through addiction, low self-esteem, social anxiety, general anxiety, that overwhelming sense of doom that … Continue reading ON POSTNATAL DEPRESSION

WHAT’S WITH THE SOCIAL CONSTRUCTS?

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about social constructs that many seem to take for granted and live by, and even more about how people who don’t want to live by them are frowned at. Like the conventional relationship set up of two people committing to each other exclusively for life, and the conventional career … Continue reading WHAT’S WITH THE SOCIAL CONSTRUCTS?